Sip the Juice

My brain is starting to unfog.

This writing every day thing is helping me rewire.

Unclogging the conduction wire.

Letting more juice flow.

Not to say that I wasn't flowing before, but I wasn't flowing before.

Time is so interesting. 

Living in a bad way felt numb. Like I wasn't in my skin. Just an observer.

My eyes didn't feel like my own.

It felt like forever. 

But it's slowly and largely faded.

So staggeringly thankful.

I don't know if I'm just used to a new normal, a new avatar, but I am starting to understand.

I am just happy to be here.

An honor to be nominated.

Writing to myself.

To my loved ones.

And to strangers (how'd you get in here?).

The thing I'm focusing on now is energy. 

The inner fuel tank.

I get about as terrible a gas mileage as my body-on-frame SUVs.

But I love 'em.

I'm not saying I want to be a Tesla or some hybrid, just want some more juice when I stomp.

Here's the thing I'm learning, though:

There was a time when I had to use my juice on just keeping myself above ground.

So I conserved it. Hoarded it. Let it stock up, even as it diminished.

But it is only by using it that the capacity regrows.

Muscle memory applying to all sorts of circuitry.

How much fuel do I got left?

I got enough to go around.